Drug Dealer

This happened a while ago, but it's too good not to share.  I sort of knew this kid because he would come in all the time with his annoying girlfriend and use the computers.  He was kind of a pain in the ass, like one time I saw him eating a hoagie at one of the tables in the back.  Really, man?  A hoagie in a library?  Gross.  But the thing is, it's hard to dislike him because he's so polite!  He asked me my name one day, and introduced himself to me, and every day I saw him after that he would say hello and he remembered my name.  I saw him chatting with a cop in the library once, and he was so pleasant and making jokes and stuff (yes, we have cops come into the library sometimes; usually because a librarian calls them in to monitor some fishy behavior, like I mentioned before with Van Halen Guy threatening another patron).  If you read the title of this particular piece, you would guess this kid is/was a drug dealer.  Let's pretend his name is Chris.  The other librarians referred to him as "Drug Dealer Chris."  I had no idea about him, but once they told me his nickname, it all made sense.  The annoying girlfriend, the hoagie, the random shady looking characters that would come in and talk to him in the back of the library and then leave…

He ended up in jail (shocking!) but not for dealing drugs.

He broke into someone's car, stole their GPS, and then took it to a pawn shop.  When he filled out the paperwork, he used his name and information.  When the guy at the pawn shop turned on the GPS he saw that it was registered to someone with a different name.  So he called the cops and it wasn't hard to find him, since all of his information was on the paperwork.

Real genius.

Very polite, though.